Civility isn't about being nice, it's about being effective.
We help individuals and organisations close the gap between respect and results. Download our free civility health check self assessment and organisation assessment to see where you are on The Civility Gap Model™.
25%
Managers Admit to S**T Behaviour
(Porath & Pearson, 2013. *Not quite in those words*)The Civility Gap exists to close the space between how we intend to communicate and how we actually show us. It is more than a training model, it is a collective shift toward conscious communication and respectful culture.
We bring together practitioners, leaders, and organisations committed to practising intentional civility, where courage, compassion, and accountability meet. Join us in closing the gap between intention and impact, and help build workplaces where everyone can speak, lead, and belong.
When respect breaks down, performance suffers.
Workplace incivility, disrespectful, dismissive, or unkind behaviour, may seem minor, but its effects are profound. In healthcare, even subtle hostility or poor communication can impact teamwork, erode trust, and ultimately compromise patient safety and outcomes.
A lack of psychological safety and poor communication are key contributors to stress and burnout among healthcare professionals. In the UK alone, an estimated 17.1 million working days are lost each year due to stress, depression, and anxiety, often linked to toxic workplace dynamics and ineffective communication (Mental Health Foundation, 2023). Research consistently shows that low trust and unclear communication not only reduce team cohesion but also increase the risk of medical errors (Leonard et al., 2004; The Joint Commission, 2021).
Incivility is alarmingly common. Up to 90% of employees report experiencing incivility at work (People Management, 2023), and its ripple effects reach patients. A landmark study by Porath and Erez (2007) found that exposure to rudeness reduces cognitive performance, decision-making accuracy and critical skills in clinical environments. Another study found that doctors and nurses who experienced incivility were significantly more likely to make diagnostic and procedural errors (Riskin et al., 2015).
The Civility Gap is the space between what we say we value, respect, compassion, and collaboration, and how we actually behave. At The Civility Gap™, we help organisations close that space. Our Civility Gap Model™ integrates insights from psychology, communication science, and leadership development to translate organisational values into daily behaviours.
When civility becomes embedded in everyday practice, teams communicate more effectively, trust increases, and patient care improves. The result is a culture where engagement rises, errors decline, and both staff and patients thrive.
Beyond compliance. Beyond ‘being nice.’
Our approach combines psychology, leadership development, and communication strategy to help people not just understand respect, but embody it.
Because culture change doesn’t happen through rules. It happens through people.
Why Civility Matters
Workplaces are changing, and so are people’s expectations.
Five generations now work side by side, each with different ideas of what respect, communication, and leadership look like.
What feels “direct” to one person might feel disrespectful to another.
When left unspoken, these differences quietly erode trust, morale, and performance.
At The Civility Gap, we help organisations bridge those divides, building cultures where empathy, accountability, and collaboration drive results.
The impact:
✔︎ Improved communication and trust between teams
✔︎Higher engagement and reduced turnover
✔︎ More confident, emotionally intelligent leaders
✔︎A culture that supports wellbeing and performance
What We Offer
At The Civility Gap, we help people and workplaces rebuild communication cultures grounded in respect, empathy, and accountability.
Our services combine evidence-based training, practical tools, and human to human coaching, creating measurable change in how people lead, speak and connect.
Our services include The Civility Leadership Pathway, Civility Assured Affiliation, coaching and consultancy, guest speaking, keynotes and events and partnership and collaboration
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Helping you develop the skills, behaviours and influence to close the civility gap.
Includes three levels:
Civility Foundations – For individuals & emerging leaders.
Focus: Self-awareness, respectful communication, emotional intelligence, bias recognition.
Outcome: Apply civility principles daily to build trust, collaboration, and respect.
Civility Leadership – For managers & executives.
Focus: Leading with respect, modelling civility, giving feedback effectively, fostering inclusion and accountability.
Outcome: Create a culture of civility, influence positively, drive performance and engagement.
Civility Strategy – For senior leaders, HR, and change managers.
Focus: Embedding civility in systems, policies, and culture; measuring and sustaining impact.
Outcome: Lead large-scale, measurable culture change.
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For organisations ready to make civility a strategic priority.
The Civility Assured Affiliation recognises workplaces that embed civility across leadership, policy, and culture.
Through audits, training, and evidence-based verification, we award the Civility Assured Mark™, a visible commitment to respectful, human-centred leadership.
Affiliation includes:
Access to The Civility Gap training framework
Annual Civility Health Checks (Organisation edition)
Guided action planning and consultancy
Independent audit and recognition as Civility Assured
Transform civility from a value into a measurable practice and join a global community of ethical leaders.
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For individuals and leaders seeking tailored development.
Our 1:1 consultancy blends behavioural insight, communication strategy, and emotional intelligence coaching to help you:
Strengthen presence under pressure
Rebuild confidence after conflict
Navigate team or leadership challenges
Develop influence, empathy, and integrity
Confidential, compassionate, and results-focused — these sessions help you model the behaviour you want to see.
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Lauri Smith is a sought-after speaker and facilitator known for her bold yet human approach to leadership and communication.
Popular topics:
The Civility Gap: Why Good People Behave Badly (and how to change it)
From Politeness to Power: The Evolution of Conscious Communication
Civility and Intergenerational Working: Bridging the Age Gap in the Workplace
Dynamic, interactive talks for conferences, summits, and organisational events — designed to challenge assumptions and inspire real change.
Watch Now
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Expanding the reach of civility education.
We partner with accredited training bodies, wellbeing organisations, and leadership networks to co-create and deliver civility programmes.
If you’re interested in licensing, joint delivery, or co-branded initiatives, we’d love to collaborate.
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Meet Lauri — the heart and strategist behind The Civility Gap.
A leadership coach, communicator, and advocate for workplaces that lead with humanity, Lauri brings decades of experience across psychology, leadership, and culture strategy.
She founded The Civility Gap to close the distance between what organisations say they value and what people actually experience — helping leaders turn empathy and accountability into everyday practice.
Free Resource: The Civility Health Check™
Discover where your culture stands, and how to close the gap.
Unclear communication, low trust, and quiet disengagement often reveal a hidden Civility Gap™, the space between what your organisation says it values and how people actually behave.
The Civility Health Check™ is a free 5-minute self-assessment and organisational assessment, designed to help individuals and organisations uncover their current civility stage and identify the next steps to strengthen communication, trust, and collaboration.
Inside you’ll get:
✔ A quick self-assessment based on The Civility Gap Model™
✔ A quick organisation-assessment based on The Civility Gap Model™
✔ Your current Civility Stage, from Unaware to Integrated
✔ Tailored next steps to strengthen respectful communication and accountability
Ready to Close the Gap?
Whether you’re starting with a single team, a leadership cohort, or a full culture change programmes, we’ll help you design a pathway to intentional civility.